HOW KIDS HEAR LOVE
Adapted from an article by Heidi Krumenauer in Focus on the Family Magazine, Feburary 2009
When the son of Focus
on the Family contributor
Heidi Krumenauer received an A on his math test, she showered him
with praise only to receive a weak smile and watch him retreat to his
room. When she returned from a business trip, her other son Noah asked her
to spend time reading to him, but she lavished him with a bag full of
gifts instead and was perplexed by his lukewarm response. Ungrateful
children? Spoiled youngsters? Probably not. Heidi found out
that she was not speaking their love language.
Just like children learn differently, they also express and receive love in their own unique way, and as parents we can help them hear and receive love if we can identify which expression of our love is in the language they can most easily hear. Read more or link to podcast on this important subject.
Gary Chapman introduced the concept of love languages in his first book on the subject, The Five Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts and later co-authored an adaptation for parents with Dr. Ross Campbell in their book The Five Love Languages of Children.
All children need the kind of emotional connection that cause them to feel special and accepted, (“have their love tank filled”) but it will look different for each child. Campbell and Chapman suggest and define the following five languages for reaching our kids (and our spouses):
- Words of Affirmation
- Acts of Service
- Quality Time
- Appropriate Physical Touch
Not only does the book take a chapter expanding on each language and how to use it, but gives parents practical suggestions and great clues on how to identify which language your children speaks most fluently. They also address speaking the languages in single parents families, anger and love, how to build love as the foundation and much more.
For more helpful information on marriage and family visit Focus on the Family at www.family.org.
Last Modified: 2012.09.15T00:42:07
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